Ael: Weight to bear

13 November 2016

Weight to bear

People asking me, why you lose so much weight? Why you're getting smaller when everyone is getting bigger?

Some pain, it's just to hard to bear. It's hard to change the pain into happiness. But when I force myself to be happy, my inner strength can't really cope because when I'm all alone, talking with my Lord, I know that I'm not that strong. I'm weak. Dunya is too hard. But yeah, I still want to appreciate every moment so that I didn't regret when it passed.

I know that Allah tested me with something that I can bear. How hard it is. But for every hardbreak, when I passed it, I feel like, I want to be someone else. I want to look different so that people can't recognize me and remind me about my past.

I want to create 'better me' in people's eyes. I want to be someone new than 'the old me'. I don't care how hard it is to damp down my heartbreak moments. I want to look different.

So, here I am. Losing my weight from 66kgs to 47kgs (1 month ago. Idk I'm losing how many kgs for this few weeks) Until I can't buy any 'free size' attire anymore. It became so big for me 🤔

Fyi, I've been granted by Allah s.w.t to be someone that can't recognize people's face if I didn't meet them for such a long time or when I met them for only few times. I just can't remember faces. So, it's easy for me to move on another step in my life. ( Please don't judge me if you meet me out there, and I can't even remember your face. I just can't 🙁. But I remember moments. If you recall my memories, I still can remember that 🤗. So tegur je, maybe I tak cam muka. But memories, will never fade. In syaa Allah)

Few weeks ago, I went to the court, and my relatives also can't remember my face as I'm losing so much weight. You know what? I feel happy! Because I just, don't want to remember how hard it is the moment I need to survive all alone, and they're just leave me like I'm no one to them. Yes. I walked away from their life, and create my own new life. 🌈

Know what? Sometimes you just need to make a move and leave people that don't appreciate your presence. Create your own future. Make new clans. Who can still 'see' you when you don't have anything to be proud of.

Don't worry. I'm losing my weight with the right diet & healthy lifestyle. I want to value myself, why should I touture the body that Allah gave to me? I just want to do something that can make me happy. 💖

INTRO

Ael for short :) /26 (by 16/5/2020)/

Bsc (Hons) in Biology Applied science

Msc Bioprocess Engineering

Soon call me Dr Ael ❤️

Passion in microbes and flowers ��

"I decide to save my memories, here.So that I can recall it like 'kachingg!' terus boleh ingat."

Techno-noob/dust hater but in love w Microbe research.

I write, bcs I want to inspire people, spread positive vibes, spread Allah's words. If you feel down/lifeless, you know, I've been in that place, lose everything in my life. My house, family, dreams, but yeah here I am, living a good life. I want you to keep walking, Put Allah 1st in your heart & trust that He is the best planner.

p/s : Aku suka menulis, and for my 2017 resolutions, I want to write something that can be counted as Ja'riah. Something that can help us in dunya & akhirah! Of course in my point of view. Thank you for reading

I'm sorry for disable my comment box due to several reasons. Anything to ask, you can email me at :

shieera94@gmail.com

TQ

WORDS

Terbang biar setinggi langit,andai jatuh masih disambut awan :)

BOLEH JADI KAMU TIDAK MENYENANGI SESUATU,
PADAHAL ITU BAIK BAGIMU.
DAN BOLEH JADI KAMU MENYUKAI SESUATU,
PADAHAL ITU TIDAK BAIK BAGIMU.
-Surah Al-Baqarah, ayat 216

Books are full of magic. Read them before sleep. You will find great changes every day and every time you wake up.

Tak kira seberapa banyak kau terjatuh di perjalanan ini,kau sememangnya harus bangkit, sentiasa percaya, dan maju ke depan.bukankah selepas ribut hujan selalu punya pelangi?

"‎Every time you start to think you are better than someone remember that Satan was the first person to say, ‘I am better than he."

Ya Allah, andai dia jodohku, pelihara hati-hati kami. Andai tidak, kau maha mengetahui apa yang terbaik untuk kami.

Bila cemburu, bila rindu, bila sedih kehilangan sesuatu, ucaplah “Ma Fi Qalbi Ghairullah (Tiada di hati ku melainkan Allah)” :)

"…Irhamu man fil ardi, yarhamukum man fis sama’…" Sayangi olehmu siapa saja yang ada di bumi, maka engkau akan disayangi oleh Dia di langit.

One million memories, ten thousand inside jokes, one hundred shared secrets. One reason: Best friends.

"If you want to know what’s inside the heart of a person you should listen to what comes out of his mouth ." :Ibn Qayyim

Make sure whenever we are tested, we are doing the best that we can do with all that we’ve got. Although we may look the ‘worst’ in front of others, Allah knows that we have tried our best. Life is never about competing ourselves with others to gain recognition from the creations rather it is about competing with our own selves to gain His recognition. Insha Allah, for the next promised life, Akhirah.

Everyone has their own past. And the past is not to be judged, but to be learned.

"Tak ada yang sempurna, Sayang. Bahkan cinta yang begitu sempurna, tetap saja suka melahirkan duka. Manusia, tetap saja tempatnya keliru dan salah."~ Tia Setiawati Priatna

"Semakin kita SAYANG kat seseorang tu, semakin tinggi ujian yang Allah berikan pada kita ! kerana Dia ingin menduga sejauh mana KESABARAN kita terhadap ‘jodoh’ yang kita miliki.. :)"

“Orang yang dah pernah merasa gelapnya jahiliah akan lebih hargai terangnya tarbiah” ( Anthem: Hlovate)

Be grateful that you can come home from school safely everyday, unlike the children in Syria and Palestine

"Ketika senyummu tak terbalas, Allah telah menghitung manisnya senyummu. Saat sapaanmu tak terjawab, Allah tak lupa berapa kata yang kau ucapkan. Saat ajakanmu tak terpenuhi, lelahmu takkan tertinggal dicatat Roqib-Nya. Ketika kau menangis atas perihnya perjuanganmu, Allah tak lalai menghitung berapa tetes air matamu. Ketika ikhtiarmu belum atau bahkan tak dihargainya, Allah senantiasa telah menghargai setiap usaha, setiap paket proses yang kau lalui. Ketika mereka lari meninggalkanmu, Allah tak pernah lupa menyertaimu"

“A real man is not the one who can court you in public or the one who can say to the world how much he loves you. Rather, real man is the one who can hide his feelings pretending that he doesn’t care, but deep inside, during his SUJUD, he’s asking for you from Allah.”

"Mari saling mendoakan. Agar malaikat pun tersenyum menyadari masih ada dua manusia yang begitu jauh dan tetap saling merindukan."-Tia Setiawati Priatna

"Jujur ku katakan, menahan perasaan di hati yang datang bertandang bukanlah sesuatu yang senang. Lebih lebih lagi jika perasaan itu berkisarkan rasa rindu, cinta dan kasih sayang. Tapi ingatlah bahawa rasa itu datangnya daripada tuhan. jadi, luahkanlah segalanya sambil menadah tangan dan berdoa agar diberi kesabaran dan ketenangan."

Anda tidak perlu terlalu bijak untuk mengambil perubatan, tetapi anda perlu rajin untuk berjaya di dalam bidang perubatan. -selfremembrance

“Aku mahu berlari, sejauh mana yang ku mampu. Untukku tinggalkan jahilnya diriku. Moga Allah memperkuatkan kaki ini agar berlari jauh lagi daripada itu.” -Al-asyrafi

❝Cinta terbaik adalah ketika kau mencintai seorang kekasih yang membuat imanmu mendewasa, taqwamu bertumbuh, cintamu pada-Nya juga bertumbuh. Cinta terbaik adalah saat kau mencintai seorang yang membuat akhlaqmu makin indah, jiwamu makin damai, hatimu makin bijak. Dia jadi penegur saat taatmu luntur. Dia jadi penasehat saat kau maksiat. Dia jadi pelipur saat semangatmu lebur. Ya, dialah cinta terbaik, yang tak hanya ingin bersamamu di dunia, tapi juga ingin bertemu kembali di surga.❞

My Lord, thank you for everything. For all blessings, and for give me so many things that makes me feel alive. Thank you for always be with me and listen to everything I'm talking about. You are my everything. May you always show me the best way, Al-wakeel :) - me, Happiness, Insyrh

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13 November 2016

Weight to bear